Lock-down Woes women the most: Are we really liberal?

• Kalpana Pun

The COVID-19 Pandemic and the ongoing lock-down has made us face some harsh realities of life, among which one ugly truth has scratched the surface of our otherwise happy life-while the stress surrounding our life is mounting at an unbelievable pace, one gender is taking the heat more than the other. For many working women this pandemic has brought both a pleasant experience as well as challenges at another side.

Gender disparity for household labor is high in countries in Asia, according to a study published by the International Labor Organization in 2019 The ILO found that women in urban areas, spend an average of 312 minutes per day on unpaid care work; the number was 291 minutes in rural areas. In Comparison, men spend only 29 and 32 minutes per day, respectively, on the same tasks. Even in the best of times, the burden of domestic work falls mostly on women.

For some women, the lock-down has almost rippled the amount of their work. A recent poll conducted on the E Times Lifestyle Twitter account; the results too brought to light the same fact that 61 percent of the respondents voted that women are more stressed than men during the lock-down. Many women, who are engaged in companies, nursing homes, clinics, and hospital lines found it especially difficult and stressful at the same time to be working from home as well as doing household chores. And many of them are working as a caretaker for their children, older adults without much support from their partners. As even today many parts of our Nepalese societies are governing by the patriarchal system. This has resulted in the absence of any self-corrective measures to correct gender equity responsibilities. Only a few of them are lucky enough to share and manage a load of household chores.

Increased in lock-down has also impacted women in physical stress as well as mental aspects. For instance, men and children who used to go out for work and school respectively are at home most of the time including elderly who needs more love, attention, and care. This creates a demanding situation for women constantly, which is about their food patterns, maintains of house, gardening and so on which are invisible. It makes them feel exhausted and stressed due to additional responsibility with no helping hands, which is creating a lack of emotional space as well. It is also impacting mental health, anxiety, loneliness, and sleep disorders. Due to household work and professional commitment they didn’t get the chance to make appropriate sleep and enough rest. Especially, Nurses, Lady Doctors, or other assistants’ workers have a high level of stress and anxiety levels because of their Night shift schedule. In the absence of mutual understanding and lack of sharing tasks among the partners, it is leading to arguments, fights, and misunderstanding in relationships. Some of the common issues that most of the women are facing during the lock-down are health issues, change in sleep patterns, mood swings, feeling of frustration, pressure, guilt, and fear.

Beyond this, many countries around the world including Nepal, have been imposing lock-downs to stop the spread of COVID-19. Somehow, lock-down is being effective measures for battling the pandemic, but they have also exposed gendered inequalities and the threats to women and vulnerabilities across the world.

In more typical circumstances, the support provided by governmental and non-governmental organizations is available to women who face domestic violence, however, there is considerably less access to such resources during lock-downs. With the restrictions on mobility, women are often unable to leave their homes to find safety with friends or extended family. Loss of partner jobs, a rise of unemployment, lack of social interaction, disengagement, unequal distribution of domestic labor during the lock-down, causing a lot of uncertainty, stress among many people. Even some of them are venting their frustration by torturing physically, sexually and financial restrictions to their wives. This is indirectly leading to an increase in violence. Legal actions can be taken when a woman faces domestic violence. However, many of them can’t even report abuse on the cell phone, as they are always surrounded by their husbands or other family members.

Age-old stereotypes, like the virus, are tenaciously resilient such as it’s is the women’s job to cook, clean, and wash. It’s the man’s job to earn. So even though we seem to have progressed in paying lip service to be ‘liberal’, the true test is in the living. In such circumstances, women facing domestic violence and house burden should approach free counseling to use helplines for reporting the crime. The National Commission for Women should ensure the specific law and awareness messages to ensure equal distribution of labor, equal rights, and the sense of self-determination to women for their empowerment.

So, during this pandemic and afterward, what could be the best way to lessen the burden resting on women’s shoulders and relieve some of the stress is a big debatable question to be discussed on an open floor. Everyone needed to realize that asking for help is not a weakness. Creating boundaries by limiting oneself in the roles of men or women that they should do is rigid around gender responsibilities in the traditional meaning of the term. During difficult times, it’s very important to take care of your health both physically and mentally. Then, taking care of your family and the community is the next concern, that can happen only by communicating and sharing responsibilities. And only when we do that perhaps we will be able to proudly say those beautifully words women share equal responsibilities, not more, right?

So, it is time to be self-reflected that the corona-virus pandemic is testing relationships across societies. Are we really liberal in pragmatic world?

(Pun is student of Masters in social work from Tribhuvan University)